A Story from a Mother.
As a mom, seeing your child suffer can be unbearable. In my case, my son was suffering month and months before I was even aware of the internal struggle he was going through. I was actually taken off guard and blind sided that the once happy, energetic, smiling boy was now refusing to eat, communicate with me and stayed in his dark bedroom hours and days at a time. I didn’t know where to turn or how to help him. I was afraid and alone in my own struggle as a mom who loved her son but also felt powerless and out of control. Slowly he eventually started to open up and share some of his internal struggles with me but there were many days that there was a dark cloud that separated us- His Depression. The road to his personal recovery journey was his road to navigate alone but I was always there to let him know while the choices were his to make, I was there night and day to offer support, a listening ear or an encouraging word. Some days the only thing I could do was get him out of bed and take him to get a meal. Many days this didn’t even happen and he refused to eat and only wanted to sleep. I also have 2 other boys who suffer with substance abuse. Although I know intellectually I did not cause or contribute to their struggles, my heart some days feels broken and I cannot control their behaviors or the consequences of their behaviors. My advise to others who are trying to support family members or friends going through these same types of situations is to try many different approaches to treatment. This is not always black and white. What may work for one person is not the best answer for another. Don’t be afraid to think “outside the box”. If one counselor does not work, don’t give up the idea of counseling but find another one. My son went to many counselors before finding one that he felt connected with. Reach out to friends you feel comfortable sharing your struggles with for support. In order for us to support our loved ones we must also find support systems for ourselves. There may be days when your child does not open up or communicate with you. They may even say angry, hurtful words. Those days, it is important to step back. We don’t always have to have the answers or direct every conversation into an advise session. Over time, the most important thing we can do as parents is to communicate love and support. Some days just listening is what is needed. You do not need to feel alone. There are so many of us who are walking the same path and I believe we can support each other. Path to Positivity is one way we can spread positive thoughts to others and take one day at a time, one mind at a time and together we can build a more positive future.
